Those days when you feel like life might just work out, that it might just throw you a bone. I really like those days,Yesterday was a day like that for me.
Excuse the absence of my blogging and upkeep of my website, Ive been sick for a while, and life kept getting in the way. But I am determined to keep it maintained and keep blogging, its the only thing that keeps me sane!
So Yesterday,
I called out of work because Ive had headaches for about three weeks and needed to make sure i didnt have brain cancer or a tumor. It was just sinus headaches, and i got pain meds out of it. Woohoo! But as i was laying in my bed, Watching hours upon hours of Supernatural my Best friend sent me a wonderful text. You know those texts that just make your day, yeah it was on of those.
And the short version is, after applying for a house with another person, getting denied and still being out of a 100$, I may now have another place to live! And exciting.
Sometimes i feel that all we need in life is a reminder that things can work out. That they might not be what we expect or when we expect. But it happens, and that is good enough for me.
My life has seen alot of changes since the beginning of 2013! A whirlwind of life and emotions. But i think that after two hellish months its all turning around in my favor, and man am i happy!
Now onto a serious note.
Should you enter into a relationship with someone you met over the internet?
Now i know its the 21st century and thats just what people do, with programs like E-harmony and Match.com it isnt very hard for the socially akward and incredibly busy to find love
But do they really work? Are they actually worth all the incredible awkward tension and the scary thought that they may not be who they are online or via text.
If you'ver seen an episode of Catfish then you understand how crazy some people will be.
Now im not talking about online relationships, where your main source of communication is the computer or your phone, im talking about actually meeting up with these people you meet and getting to know them.
I have entered into one of these said relationships. EEk! You might think im crazy, but sometimes things just happen and you dont really know how it got there. Well we didnt meet on a website, more or less an App...for my iphone. Double EEk! Now we have face-timed and he does look like his picture and seems somewhat normal, if not a little geeky. But thats my thing. So now we ask ourselves this question "Am i actually going to try and make this work?" Or "Is this just a friend thing?"
With me, it always seems that i end up with all of these men just being my friend, and this is my doing, now theirs. Im a bit of a maneater.
But i have plans to see him this weekend after attending a friends wedding. Now this might be a fluke, it might be awesome. I might totally bail, it just all depends honestly on my mood that day :)
But if i dont return in a week ive either been kidnapped or murdered.
Updates to come!
Keep Safe, and Stay Offline!
Xoxo
Sophie
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Sunday, February 17, 2013
A flight of fear
It always seems that in the darkest of times, you re-discover yourself.
Well the attempt at moving out failed, and money just fell through my pockets.
But in these last few weeks I've discovered what true friends are, and what true friends want to be.
The ones who just save you for a backup plan, and the ones who have no one else except you. It's an extreme life lesson, and one that's hardest to learn when it deals with people you never thought you would have to even evaluate as your friends.
Also that loneliness is often confused with independence. And that freedom, true freedom is having nothing holding you down, and no-one keeping you around. That freedom isn't money, fame or success. It's an inner peace of knowing who you are, and knowing you need no-one and nothing to complete you.
I've figured out that this is the reason I'm mostly always single. I have yet to find a man who lets me be as free as I am alone. If you find someone like that, fight for them with every ounce of strength in you, and until then, don't give one single fuck.
The moment I find a man who allows me to feel unrestrained and is just as at peace with himself as I am with myself, I'll hold onto him. But for now, along with my selection of friends, I cannot let anyone hold me back from being who I am.
Both places of employment are terrible as in I'm overworked and underpaid, disregarded and overlooked.
I did not fight for 20 years to live up to these two bill paying jobs. And that be the end of it.
With nothing hold me back, I think I'm gunna take that leap I've been wanting too.
I may be broke, tired and homeless at the end. But I will be free.
Maybe L.A. , maybe London.
One or the other, I'm making a commitment to myself to go.
Stay free, and take risks,
Xoxo
Sophie
Well the attempt at moving out failed, and money just fell through my pockets.
But in these last few weeks I've discovered what true friends are, and what true friends want to be.
The ones who just save you for a backup plan, and the ones who have no one else except you. It's an extreme life lesson, and one that's hardest to learn when it deals with people you never thought you would have to even evaluate as your friends.
Also that loneliness is often confused with independence. And that freedom, true freedom is having nothing holding you down, and no-one keeping you around. That freedom isn't money, fame or success. It's an inner peace of knowing who you are, and knowing you need no-one and nothing to complete you.
I've figured out that this is the reason I'm mostly always single. I have yet to find a man who lets me be as free as I am alone. If you find someone like that, fight for them with every ounce of strength in you, and until then, don't give one single fuck.
The moment I find a man who allows me to feel unrestrained and is just as at peace with himself as I am with myself, I'll hold onto him. But for now, along with my selection of friends, I cannot let anyone hold me back from being who I am.
Both places of employment are terrible as in I'm overworked and underpaid, disregarded and overlooked.
I did not fight for 20 years to live up to these two bill paying jobs. And that be the end of it.
With nothing hold me back, I think I'm gunna take that leap I've been wanting too.
I may be broke, tired and homeless at the end. But I will be free.
Maybe L.A. , maybe London.
One or the other, I'm making a commitment to myself to go.
Stay free, and take risks,
Xoxo
Sophie
Monday, February 4, 2013
Home of the Free, Land of the Brave
It always sucks when reality pops up and bites you in the ass.
That has been my week. A week full of ass chomping, and it's only Monday. Well..Tuesday.
Declined for a house, out of 100 bucks, my car needs it's oil changed, my bank needs 300$ for my credit card and my taxes are apparently never getting returned to me.
I'm sure you've just had one of those days, or weeks or month. Where everything decides it doesn't want to cooperate, and reality just keeps smacking you in the ass reminding you that you can't live in fantasy land. That your an adult, and you've got to make big girl decisions. You've got bills to pay, and not enough hours at work to pay them.
I find that after a few good cries, and a incredibly hard workout session you feel better. Exhausted, but better. I decided to read a book,an entire book in 4 hours today, so my brain is fried.
I feel like when everything goes to shit, you see what is really important in life, and how much money you spend on just crap. I feel like we spend money of things we don't need, we slave at jobs we will never like and we push our dreams on the back shelf.
I have this obsession with freedom, with being free. Without limits, without rules. And I defined freedom as never having to feel bad for doing what makes you happy, what you think is right.
But recently I've discovered that freedom is nothing like that. True freedom for yourself is being the best you, that you can be. It's never feeling bad for who you are and what you believe, but it's also never deciding that someone else's beliefs and decisions are wrong. It's embracing people for who they are, with no preconceived ideas, no stereotypes. For never being afraid of life, and of Challenges and problems. Freedom for me, is realizing that you've got to give up every inch of yourself, to understand what it means to be free. To giving it up to your dreams, your friends, your family and your everyday life. To never letting people or social media define who you are.
It's never having to define anyone, or anything.
We put people in boxes, in stereotypes and labels, in which we limit them. We limit them in our minds to what they can do and what they an accomplish, therefore stealing the freedom of being who they are from them. And we constantly do to each other, so we are all just endlessly bound up in each others labels and lives, instead of just living our own.
My New Years resolution was basically to not give a shit about anything, and it's worked out quite well for me actually. But what comes with that, is accepting that you really can't give a shit about what other people do either.
So in bringing this back around, I just cannot give a shit about this week anymore. Neither should you, you should focus on being happy, healthy and free. Life tends to find a way to work itself out, so stop stressing. Stop bothering yourself with other people's lives and decisions. Live yours, and let life unfold for you.
Keep calm and don't give one shit,
Xoxo
Sophie
That has been my week. A week full of ass chomping, and it's only Monday. Well..Tuesday.
Declined for a house, out of 100 bucks, my car needs it's oil changed, my bank needs 300$ for my credit card and my taxes are apparently never getting returned to me.
I'm sure you've just had one of those days, or weeks or month. Where everything decides it doesn't want to cooperate, and reality just keeps smacking you in the ass reminding you that you can't live in fantasy land. That your an adult, and you've got to make big girl decisions. You've got bills to pay, and not enough hours at work to pay them.
I find that after a few good cries, and a incredibly hard workout session you feel better. Exhausted, but better. I decided to read a book,an entire book in 4 hours today, so my brain is fried.
I feel like when everything goes to shit, you see what is really important in life, and how much money you spend on just crap. I feel like we spend money of things we don't need, we slave at jobs we will never like and we push our dreams on the back shelf.
I have this obsession with freedom, with being free. Without limits, without rules. And I defined freedom as never having to feel bad for doing what makes you happy, what you think is right.
But recently I've discovered that freedom is nothing like that. True freedom for yourself is being the best you, that you can be. It's never feeling bad for who you are and what you believe, but it's also never deciding that someone else's beliefs and decisions are wrong. It's embracing people for who they are, with no preconceived ideas, no stereotypes. For never being afraid of life, and of Challenges and problems. Freedom for me, is realizing that you've got to give up every inch of yourself, to understand what it means to be free. To giving it up to your dreams, your friends, your family and your everyday life. To never letting people or social media define who you are.
It's never having to define anyone, or anything.
We put people in boxes, in stereotypes and labels, in which we limit them. We limit them in our minds to what they can do and what they an accomplish, therefore stealing the freedom of being who they are from them. And we constantly do to each other, so we are all just endlessly bound up in each others labels and lives, instead of just living our own.
My New Years resolution was basically to not give a shit about anything, and it's worked out quite well for me actually. But what comes with that, is accepting that you really can't give a shit about what other people do either.
So in bringing this back around, I just cannot give a shit about this week anymore. Neither should you, you should focus on being happy, healthy and free. Life tends to find a way to work itself out, so stop stressing. Stop bothering yourself with other people's lives and decisions. Live yours, and let life unfold for you.
Keep calm and don't give one shit,
Xoxo
Sophie
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)